Ruby Reflects on Her Journey So Far
by RUBY GETTINGER
Note: This week's episode featured the songs "Everything" by Rob Blackledge and "Gotta Figure This Out" by Erin McCarley.
Hi, y'all! Thanks for watching the season finale this week.
The weight loss camp was amazing, and the kids I met there were too. I loved their spirit! But it was a HUGE reminder to me that society does not accept us. These children have the most beautiful souls and so much love to give. People will never know what they are missing out on by refusing to look beyond someone's shell. I pray all of us can change this starting today, and the first person we need to fix is ourselves.
When I started out on this journey, I never imagined that all that has happened was even possible. God has blessed me every step of the way with all of y'all! I always believed there were more good people in this world than bad, and the support y'all have shown me confirms that.
Y'all have truly been on this journey with me. You saw me go cold turkey from junk food to Ourlife Fresh, and you witnessed how I went from hating it—so much that I felt like I was being punished—to loving it! You've watched me with my family and friends and at Women's Fat Night. (I love my girls!) Y'all have seen my ex-boyfriend Dennycome back into my life. You've seen me go up and down on the scales and have been there with me in my darkest hours, when I lost my hero, my Daddy, and also my rebel and baby, Lucy.
Everything I do for the first time, y'all do with me; everything I find out, good or bad, so do you. You watched the first time I ever saw a therapist and you saw me ultimately walk out on him. You watched me start off exercising in a chair and walking five minutes and saw me progress to boxing, dancing and more with my new trainers, Drew and Shazia. You watched me walk my first 5k. You watched the first time I played tennis, watched me swim across a pool, sit behind a steering wheel, go camping, fishing, ride a bike, kayak, ride a horse. OH! And let's not forget going to see the Christmas Doctor, Dr. Moses.
I need so badly to tell everyone of y'all who have supported, believed, prayed, emailed and rooted for me: Your messages in the Ruby community and on Facebook, MySpace and Twitter mean everything, and I could neverhave gone as far as I have without each and every one of you! You truly are on this journey with me, even those of you who are fighting a different beast. We come from all sizes, ages, nationalities, colors and backgrounds, and I am honored to call you my friends. I love you and pray for you daily!
For me, losing all this weight is unlocking a person who has always dreamed—and finally letting her live her dreams.
I have always been happy and lived my life, no matter how much I weighed, whether society accepted me or not. I have enjoyed my life and have laughed more than most and always believed in the impossible. I just could never figure out why my weight was so much bigger than me. I could never figure out how in the world it had such control over me. I always felt like I was in a cage. But my cage was decorated so pretty...for some reason I couldn't come out! The cage was always locked by the beast, and every time the beast would leave the door unlocked I would open it slowly and start to come out, only to have the beast come out of nowhere and push me back in. But now I am finding out I always had the key; so what does that mean?
Sometimes a 30-minute show isn't long enough to convey all that is happening with me, and I'm hoping to fill in some gaps by opening up my diary for y'all; it comes out this Tuesday! (But you can preorder it now.) There is a lot about me that y'all still don't know, and I want to share those parts of my life with you! I found I can get through some really tough times without turning to food. In my diary, I share with you a letter I wrote my dad after I lost him. I talk about my babies, Foxy and Lucy…and of course I never knew I would lose one so soon. My older brother Clyde got sick, but instead of turning to food for comfort, I turned to God, friends, family and, of course, my diary.
I've been desperately trying to recover the missing years of my childhood. I have finally recovered my first memory, and I describe it in my diary. The memory came at the oddest time! It really gave me hope that my walls could finally be breaking down. I also share a recurring nightmare I had throughout my childhood, and how I am looking into it.
I want you to know I will reach my goal and my God-given destiny—thanks, in part, to all of you! I believe in ME and YOU! Please fight with me and never give up and let's make our IMPOSSIBLE...POSSIBLE! I know we can!
P.S.: I made a special slideshow to look back at my journey so far and to pay tribute to those of you who I've met along the way. Click here to watch!
